Tardio

Pastor

Milk Kid

Dickie Bailey

Sally Lamonsoff

Scoreboard Guy

Kurt McKenzie

Bailey's Son

Marcus Higgins

Bridget Hilliard

Robideaux

Bean Lamonsoff

Sadie Tardio

Norby the Ride Guy

Bobby 'Buzzer' Ferdinando

Waitress

Keithie Feder

Lenny Feder

Geezer

Charlotte McKenzie

Referee

Jasmine Hilliard

Rob Hilliard

Tardio's Wife

Water Park Stud

Greg Feder

Andre McKenzie

Mama Ronzoni

Bailey's Wife

Higgins' Father

Malcolm